The Lollygabber

Excerpt from “The Rental Property”

June 5, 2010 at 10:00 am Leave a comment

I wanted to wear something special for the SAE formal, so I asked Lera if she had anything I could borrow.

Lera was the kind of woman who thought she was prettier than she really was.  You know the type: a “six” who thinks she’s a “nine,” a woman who dresses as if she’s 30 pounds lighter and 10 years younger than she actually is. She also had an inflated sense of intellect, parenting skills, and sexual prowess. In the beginning, I didn’t notice her superficial or personality flaws. Once the relationship started to sour, however, she began to disgust me in the strangest of ways.

“Try this blue cocktail dress. It’s too big for me, so you can keep it if you like it.”

The dress was a size 6, so I knew it would be too tight. I took it into the master bathroom and pretended to try it on.

“Oh, this is way too big,” I hollered. “I think I’ll just wear the one I bought.”

“Let me see,” Lera requested skeptically as she opened the bathroom door without knocking.

“Oops! Too late. Here ya go. I gotta get ready.” I casually handed her the dress and turned on the shower, hoping she’d take the cue.

She didn’t.

Entry filed under: Excerpt, Health and Beauty. Tags: Beauty, Fiction, LGBTQ.